that time i got real

          For the longest time, I thought I was a realist. I get how things are, I don't fool myself into believing anything ridiculous... or do I? Lately, I've determined that {thanks to my imagination, expectations, and a penchant for fairytales} I am, in fact, an idealist. My brain is filled with delusions of grandeur. Let's say I convince myself that I'm going to paint a 10 foot canvas, install it in my living room, and then sit back and admire my handy work. I even buy all the materials! But, what happens is I decide that it won't be good enough. I even did this back when I wanted to do the 30 for 30. I went through my closet pulling out one shirt after another until I psyched myself out and decided I would be too cold to do it or I would get too bored with it.

          I've decided not to let my preposterously high expectations stop me from doing things anymore. I need to be creative & if it doesn't turn out the way it is in my brain well, practice, practice, practice.

via

In case you're wondering here are some examples of my wild imagination:

1//When I envision throwing parties, I imagine that everyone is going to mingle, dress up, & stay until the wee hours of the morning having riveting conversation.
2//I always picture weddings to be these elaborate events where I'm wearing my favorite dress, my hair looks like it was done by a stylist, there's an open bar, and there's possibly going to be a choreographed dance that isn't something terrible {chicken dance, I'm looking at you}.
3//I imagine that all my perseverance & hard work will pay off and I will find a great job in a fun city where maybe I'll get a raise for a job well done.
4//I expect that my birthdays are going to be amazing from start to finish and I'm going to come home to find a bathroom filled with balloons and something I've wanted for forever all wrapped & on the kitchen table.
5//I once visited NYC and expected the whole place to be like stepping into a scene from Sex & the City.

Here I go, back to realism.

happy list monday

On Friday afternoon, right after my students went home for the day I had to go down to meet with my principal to acknowledge that I was given my pink slip due to "a serious financial challenge" that will "affect programs, staff, and students at all levels."
For someone who puts everything into her career, this is one of those things that is infuriating & disappointing. I'm also a natural-born worrier,  but instead of being sad, I've decided be awesome instead.

Is this happy list more difficult to write? Without a doubt. But, I think that also makes it the most important happy list that I've ever written. I could cry, yell, and point fingers at who should have been let go instead but instead I'm going to put my energy into finishing out the year, finding something for September, and separating my life & career from one another.

Without further ado, let's get to what's making me happy today:

71.          toddler art work
{Kyleigh has been drawing birds these days. Are you seeing how stinking cute this is?!}

72.          animal print apparel & accessories
{like this Ann Taylor cardigan that I found at The GW for $7!}

73.          candles {especially Voluspa candles}

74.          getting a great parking spot {extra happiness when this happens during rain, cold, &/or snow}
75.          bacon... i love me some bacon.

mwah ha ha

I have nothing to say today. This is day 4 of what feels like a black plague on my immune system. I actually ventured outside today to clear my car {of filthy, dirty, nasty snow}, pay my rent, & buy laundry detergent.

I leave you with this photo of Igby enjoying some media time.

True story about this pink cover: I ordered it from amazon & got it yesterday. It was on my computer for all of 2 minutes when Igby decided that he wanted it as his toy. So now it's got tears & kitty teeth marks in it. I had to order a new one and I'm a bit disgruntled about it. I suppose this is what I should expect from a cat who steals pacifiers from infants.

no, i don't think i will

We all have things that we are willing to spend a lot of money on and things that we can't rationalize dropping more than a few pennies. It's not that I'm a cheapskate so much as I just don't see why I would pay more than I think things are worth.

No, I don't think I will...

buy a greeting card unless it's unique &/or makes me laugh out loud. First, the so-called sentiments aren't really all that impressive. Second, the price is absolutely ridiculous for some letter pressed & folded cardstock. I'd rather make my own using inspiration that I find online.

via Zimbio

rent a movie for $3.99 {or more!} when I can go to redbox and pay under $1.25 for it. In fact, I try to reserve it online just so I can save the quarter.

pay full price for a dvd when I can go to amazon & buy it brand new {and probably on blu ray} for less.

{Have you seen this movie? So good!}

pay for popcorn & soda at the movie theater. After paying $9 for a ticket, I'll either sit through the movie without anything or bring in my own beverage thankyouverymuch.

What are some things you refuse to spend a lot for?

your mouth makes your butt look fat

I've been having my students set a goal for themselves that they can work on throughout the school year and see results by June 2012. It can be anything from reading x number of books to raising hands more often in class. Never one to give the kiddos an assignment I wouldn't do myself, I've been giving a lot of thought to my own resolutions.  Should it be...
To make sure I make a delicious dinner with organic vegetables every night?
To spend at least 2 hours at the gym attempting to gain muscle in these spaghetti arms?
To never ever go to bed without washing my face no matter how tired I am?

They're all decent enough resolutions. But, let's face it, I'm only going to do any of those for about 6 months and then go back to my old ways. Big Macs are just so scrumptious, I don't like going out to the gym in the cold because it takes me forever to get warm, and sometimes I am too tired to walk up the stairs let alone wash my face. Well then what could I possibly do that would have enough of an impact on me that I would want- no, yearn to do all year?

Well, frienditos the answer is simple. I'm going to stop putting up with people's backhanded compliments. I don't know if you've ever had someone tell you something like,
"I hate that color and that shirt, but it works on you."
Or, "I'm surprised someone your age understands that."
Let's never forget,
"You do ____ pretty well for a girl."

Ob. Nox. Ious.

I don't know if it's because I've been getting more of these than usual or if I really put that much thought into my resolution, but they stink and I just don't like them. Generally I just blow them off, but you know what? I never retaliate. I could and perhaps I should, but I don't. Unless you pee glitter and poop out pineapple you aren't the bee's knees. Am I right or am I right?

2012, I'm ready for you. Let's do this thing.